It's the happiest season of all,With those holiday greetings,
And great happy meetings.
When friends come to call,
It's the happiest season of all.
Friday, December 21, 2007
KAKA Gathers
It's the happiest season of all,With those holiday greetings,
And great happy meetings.
When friends come to call,
It's the happiest season of all.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Yellow
I must've done something really good to have been blessed by wonderful friends - they're not much but just enough for me to keep them in my memory bank until forever.
Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do,
Yeah they were all yellow.
Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do,
Yeah they were all yellow.
I Bruise Easily
I bruise easily, so be gentle when you handle me.
There's a mark you leave, like a love heart, carved on a tree.
I bruise easily, can't scratch the surface without moving me.
Underneath I bruise easily, I bruise easily.
- Natasha Bedingfield
There's a mark you leave, like a love heart, carved on a tree.
I bruise easily, can't scratch the surface without moving me.
Underneath I bruise easily, I bruise easily.
- Natasha Bedingfield
Monday, December 17, 2007
Cab Thoughts
"As long as you love me, I'll be okay."
These lovely words, almost shook me - I meant that in a very good way because out of nowhere, Hon just blurted it out. Corny as it may seemed to be but I'd always take that from that same man whose love I promise to keep.
What can I say? Love bug has bitten me 4 years ago and left me a pretty scar.
These lovely words, almost shook me - I meant that in a very good way because out of nowhere, Hon just blurted it out. Corny as it may seemed to be but I'd always take that from that same man whose love I promise to keep.
What can I say? Love bug has bitten me 4 years ago and left me a pretty scar.
Friday, December 14, 2007
I'm so Flattered
It must be the endless zing with wordplay or just the sheer indulgence of writing. I cannot point.
Ha! Still and all, I am flattered.
But it leaves me with - are you saying that only the genius can understand my writings? I hope not.
Ha! Still and all, I am flattered.
But it leaves me with - are you saying that only the genius can understand my writings? I hope not.
Live Forever
Maybe I will never be
All the things that I want to be
But now is not the time to cry
Now's the time to find out why
I think you're the same as me
We see things they'll never see
You and I are gonna live forever
We're gonna live forever
- Oasis
All the things that I want to be
But now is not the time to cry
Now's the time to find out why
I think you're the same as me
We see things they'll never see
You and I are gonna live forever
We're gonna live forever
- Oasis
Fight and Might
Rapt with certain darkness;
The water is getting more abysmal;
Lifting one's head day by day.
Grasping for more air - just to breathe.
Shy away that certain blues;
And give away those sweet and lovely smiles;
But behind the closed doors -
A sobbing and jumbled soul.
At the break of the dawn;
Certain sadness still crawls;
To fight the adversity all the days;
And leaves the soul to almost wonder.
Lessons are to be learned;
Hope is still quite intact;
One the day, the soul will brag -
"No regrets -
For I lived, loved and laughed with all my might."
The water is getting more abysmal;
Lifting one's head day by day.
Grasping for more air - just to breathe.
Shy away that certain blues;
And give away those sweet and lovely smiles;
But behind the closed doors -
A sobbing and jumbled soul.
At the break of the dawn;
Certain sadness still crawls;
To fight the adversity all the days;
And leaves the soul to almost wonder.
Lessons are to be learned;
Hope is still quite intact;
One the day, the soul will brag -
"No regrets -
For I lived, loved and laughed with all my might."
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Fall On Me
Hear me now
Hear my voice
Speaking the words of love
Betrayed and died
How lucky you are
Just open your eyes and see
- Moonstar 88
Hear my voice
Speaking the words of love
Betrayed and died
How lucky you are
Just open your eyes and see
- Moonstar 88
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
No Comment
The snoopy would almost always wonder why I don't allow such readers to write their comments on each piece I would publish on my page.
My roots are distinct and that facile.
1. This page was created solely for MY thoughts - that at the time they were written, they were true to me although it may not necessarily be true to me in the offing. Nothing is so absolute, yes?
2. Having said that, I would not want for the curious to dump their balderdash on my precieux tabloid. While I am all up for "agreeing to disagree", I am taking this as a precaution to eschew uncalled-for comments - be it good or bad. If such readers would want to comment on anything I wrote, they can take it somewhere else and better yet, publish their own blog.
3. I don't write because I am a sucker for approval and attention. Hell no! I simply write because of the sheer need to express. Come on, can't you see - I ALWAYS beg to differ?! The writer in me writes to express, NEVER to impress.
Should you still find yourself flustered about such reasons I just cited, that is not my problem anymore. As always, I will move on, shine in my own little way and will unceasingly write - agree or not.
My roots are distinct and that facile.
1. This page was created solely for MY thoughts - that at the time they were written, they were true to me although it may not necessarily be true to me in the offing. Nothing is so absolute, yes?
2. Having said that, I would not want for the curious to dump their balderdash on my precieux tabloid. While I am all up for "agreeing to disagree", I am taking this as a precaution to eschew uncalled-for comments - be it good or bad. If such readers would want to comment on anything I wrote, they can take it somewhere else and better yet, publish their own blog.
3. I don't write because I am a sucker for approval and attention. Hell no! I simply write because of the sheer need to express. Come on, can't you see - I ALWAYS beg to differ?! The writer in me writes to express, NEVER to impress.
Should you still find yourself flustered about such reasons I just cited, that is not my problem anymore. As always, I will move on, shine in my own little way and will unceasingly write - agree or not.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
An Apt Reminder
People always think that the most painful thing in life is losing the one you value. The truth is, the most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of valuing too much and forgetting that you are special too.
Monday, December 10, 2007
Raise Delinquent Kids
Some sort of a warning to parents and/or guardians in rising kids.
How to Raise Delinquent Kids:
1. Give the child everything he wants. In this way he will grow up believing the world owes him a living.
2. When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. This will make him think he's cute. It will also encourage him to pick up cuter phrases that will blow off the top of your head later.
3. Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he's 21 and let him decide for himself.
4. Pick up everything he leaves lying around - books, shoes, clothing. Do everything for him so he will be experienced in throwing all responsibility to others.
5. Avoid the use of the word "wrong." He may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him to believe later, when he is arrested for stealing a car, that society is against him and he is being persecuted.
6. Let him read any printed matter he can get his hands on. Be careful that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let his mind feed on garbage.
7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of your children. In this way they will not be too shocked when the home is broken up later.
8. Give a child all the spending money he wants.
9. Satisfy his every craving for food, drink and comfort. See that every sensual desire is gratified. Denial may lead to harmful frustration.
10. Take his side against neighbors, teachers and policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.
11. When he gets into real trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, "I never could do anything with him."
12. Prepare for a life of grief. You will be apt to have it.
How to Raise Delinquent Kids:
1. Give the child everything he wants. In this way he will grow up believing the world owes him a living.
2. When he picks up bad words, laugh at him. This will make him think he's cute. It will also encourage him to pick up cuter phrases that will blow off the top of your head later.
3. Never give him any spiritual training. Wait until he's 21 and let him decide for himself.
4. Pick up everything he leaves lying around - books, shoes, clothing. Do everything for him so he will be experienced in throwing all responsibility to others.
5. Avoid the use of the word "wrong." He may develop a guilt complex. This will condition him to believe later, when he is arrested for stealing a car, that society is against him and he is being persecuted.
6. Let him read any printed matter he can get his hands on. Be careful that the silverware and drinking glasses are sterilized, but let his mind feed on garbage.
7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of your children. In this way they will not be too shocked when the home is broken up later.
8. Give a child all the spending money he wants.
9. Satisfy his every craving for food, drink and comfort. See that every sensual desire is gratified. Denial may lead to harmful frustration.
10. Take his side against neighbors, teachers and policemen. They are all prejudiced against your child.
11. When he gets into real trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, "I never could do anything with him."
12. Prepare for a life of grief. You will be apt to have it.
Friday, December 7, 2007
Phoenix Rising
Swat me with all your might;
Pretermit me all you want;
Spade me with all that there is;
I will cry -
But I will rise again and again.
Pretermit me all you want;
Spade me with all that there is;
I will cry -
But I will rise again and again.
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Christmas Wish
No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end.
- Amy Grant, My Grown Up Christmas Wish
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end.
- Amy Grant, My Grown Up Christmas Wish
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Missing Hon
It dawned on me,
I haven't seen you in days.
Something is unequivocally amiss.
Hurry! Run to me from far away -
And feel my loving warmth.
I haven't seen you in days.
Something is unequivocally amiss.
Hurry! Run to me from far away -
And feel my loving warmth.
I Miss You
To see you when I wake up
Is a gift I didn't think could be real.
To know that you feel the same as I do
is a three-fold, Utopian dream.
You do something to me that I can't explain.
So would I be out of line if I said,
I miss you.
- Incubus
Is a gift I didn't think could be real.
To know that you feel the same as I do
is a three-fold, Utopian dream.
You do something to me that I can't explain.
So would I be out of line if I said,
I miss you.
- Incubus
Lessons from Peninsula
EM Maceda
December 4th 2007
Daily Tribune
December 4th 2007
Daily Tribune
1. No coup led by military elements can succeed without people's support.
2. People will not come out unless they know who will take over if the people power activity succeeds. Major opposition groups did not join because they believed it would have resulted in a takeover by a military junta.
3. Civil society by itself cannot draw people out unless prominent political leaders are seen leading the gathering.
4. Three bishops who do not have the stature of a cardinal or archbishop of Manila also do not have sufficient drawing power. What happened to Bishop Antonio Tobias? Where was Bishop Deogracias Yniguez?
5. With Army Brig. Gen. Danilo Lim, Sen. Antonio Trillanes IV and company able to leave the Makati City Regional Trial Court and walk three kilometers and two hours to Manila Peninsula hotel without anybody blocking them raise questions about PNP and AFP. They said they had advance intelligence reports.
6. The ramming of a tank into the Peninsula lobby was an overkill and brute demonstration of the arrogance of power, if not fear.
7. The arrest of media persons was totally unnecessary and also demonstrated lack of mature leadership in the PNP. This became the main story. Will the National Press Club make good in its plan to file cases against the PNP?
8. The declaration of curfew again demonstrated the martial law mentality of the Arroyo administration. (akaDelilah: But to me it was rather necessary.)
9. The conduct of Lim was puzzling.
10. Unless GMA wakes up and attends to the valid complaints of military men, her government will continue to be unstable. Protests and rallies will persist.
Columnist Liling Briones stated it clearly: "When open violation of the simplest rules of accountability continues, when cries of justice remain unheard, when open bribery continues unabated and legal procedures are ignored with impunity, acts of defiance will erupt at the most unpredictable times."
11. Makati City Mayor Jejomar Binay was correct in not having rushed to the Peninsula. As the president of United Opposition and a confirmed critic of the administration, he would have been accused of being part of the Lim/Trillanes/KME/civil society/"United Forces" activity and today would be charged of rebellion.
12. Defense Secretary Gilbert Teodoro and Interior Secretary Ronaldo Puno were clearly in charge. They should investigate why the AFP and PNP intelligence services were caught by surprise.
13. Who will pay for the damages to the Peninsula?
14. Lim and Trillanes, bright PMA graduates, must have had a good reason for them to have gone to the Peninsula. In due time, truth will come out.
2. People will not come out unless they know who will take over if the people power activity succeeds. Major opposition groups did not join because they believed it would have resulted in a takeover by a military junta.
3. Civil society by itself cannot draw people out unless prominent political leaders are seen leading the gathering.
4. Three bishops who do not have the stature of a cardinal or archbishop of Manila also do not have sufficient drawing power. What happened to Bishop Antonio Tobias? Where was Bishop Deogracias Yniguez?
5. With Army Brig. Gen. Danilo Lim, Sen. Antonio Trillanes IV and company able to leave the Makati City Regional Trial Court and walk three kilometers and two hours to Manila Peninsula hotel without anybody blocking them raise questions about PNP and AFP. They said they had advance intelligence reports.
6. The ramming of a tank into the Peninsula lobby was an overkill and brute demonstration of the arrogance of power, if not fear.
7. The arrest of media persons was totally unnecessary and also demonstrated lack of mature leadership in the PNP. This became the main story. Will the National Press Club make good in its plan to file cases against the PNP?
8. The declaration of curfew again demonstrated the martial law mentality of the Arroyo administration. (akaDelilah: But to me it was rather necessary.)
9. The conduct of Lim was puzzling.
10. Unless GMA wakes up and attends to the valid complaints of military men, her government will continue to be unstable. Protests and rallies will persist.
Columnist Liling Briones stated it clearly: "When open violation of the simplest rules of accountability continues, when cries of justice remain unheard, when open bribery continues unabated and legal procedures are ignored with impunity, acts of defiance will erupt at the most unpredictable times."
11. Makati City Mayor Jejomar Binay was correct in not having rushed to the Peninsula. As the president of United Opposition and a confirmed critic of the administration, he would have been accused of being part of the Lim/Trillanes/KME/civil society/"United Forces" activity and today would be charged of rebellion.
12. Defense Secretary Gilbert Teodoro and Interior Secretary Ronaldo Puno were clearly in charge. They should investigate why the AFP and PNP intelligence services were caught by surprise.
13. Who will pay for the damages to the Peninsula?
14. Lim and Trillanes, bright PMA graduates, must have had a good reason for them to have gone to the Peninsula. In due time, truth will come out.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Cold and Bored
Ha! I got this survey from Lianna via email and thought this one is something worth answering.
1. What bill do you hate paying the most?
Insurance.
2. Where's the best place to eat a romantic dinner?
Antonio's in Tagaytay.
3. Last time you puked from drinking?
Just last Saturday.
4. Have you ever gotten drunk and danced on a bar?
Nope.
5. Name of your first grade teacher?
Miss Anita Bongolan, she taught me to appreciate English.
6. What are you doing right now?
Aside from answering these questions, I am at work taking my first break of the day.
7. What did you want to be when you were growing up?
I wanted to be just like my Mom and her love for Economics but I grew up loving anything but Economics, Accounting, History and Filipino.
8. How many colleges did you attend?
Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila and Ateneo de Manila University.
9. Why did you get the shirt that you have on right now?
Well, this is not really a shirt but a blouse. You see, I am in my business attire.
10. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you where would you go?
I have so many in my list but right now, I want to be in Bora-bora, French Polynesia with Hon or Cambodia with Mom and siblings.
11. First thought when the alarm went off this morning?
Darn! I snoozed my phone again and again. Haha.
12. Last thought before going to sleep last night?
May God keep me from evil.
13. Favorite hairstyle?
On me? I have always loved my hair to be this sexy short.
14. Favorite hairstyle of the opposite sex?
Short and clean.
--------------------------------------------------
1. How do you deal with sudden bouts of loneliness?
I cry for awhile then pray then write.
2. Do you bite your nails?
Nope.
3. Are you a jealous person?
I am a jealous girlfriend. I tend to be very nosey, wears my Delilah hat and gets quite angry at those women/girls who try to be extra close to my man. Don't dare me.
4. Are you allergic to anything?
Some seafoods - shrimp and crab.
5. What books, if any, have made you cry?
Tuesdays with Morrie and The Notebook.
6. Does it get annoying when somebody says they'll call you, but doesn't?
It depends on who this somebody is.
7. What is your favorite simple ice-cream flavor?
Baskin-Robbins' World class Chocolate.
8. Whose car were you in last...?
MGE's.
9. What would you rather be doing right now?
Sleeping. This kinda cold weather makes me wanna lie in bed and sleep all day.
10. What song lyrics, if any, are stuck in your head at the moment?
Incubus' The Warmth.
11. What did you dress up as for Halloween?
Nobody.
12. What is your favorite TV show?
House MD.
13. Do you get along better with the same or opposite sex?
Most of the time its the opposite sex but I have a good number of wonderful girl friends.
14. Can others make you cry easily?
As much as I hate to admit it, yes.
15. Who was the last person to piss you off?
Someone who is the closest.
16. Are you picky about spelling and grammar?
Super. I am OC too with how the piece looks like - proper capitalization and justified paragraph form. Ha! Sue me.
17. Do you pay attention to calories on the back of packages?
Nope. I can eat like there's no more tomorrow and don't gain weight.
18. If you could be any type of dress, what would you be?
Little sexy black dress.
19. How many hours of sleep do you need to function?
I have gotten used to not getting enough sleep and still function. Its a practice I have learned in college (PLM).
20. When was the last time you slept on the floor?
I don't remember myself sleeping on the floor.
21. Have you ever been attracted to someone, but not physically?
Never. I always get attracted to others physically (clean looking) and mentally (wits should blow me).
22. What are some things that are needed in a relationship?
Tons of love, respect and trust.
23. Do you like traveling?
I certainly do.
24. Would you ever date someone covered in tattoos?
Nope. I have always dated clean looking boys err men.
25. Do you believe the guy should pay on the first date?
Yes.
26. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?
Nope. I am content with my two ear piercings (one of each).
27. Which do you make: dreams or plans
Both.
28. Can you speak any languages other than English?
Filipino but I speak and express myself better in English - blame it on my environment and books I read.
29. What is your favorite salad dressing?
Vinaigrette, good ol' Asian and Caesar's.
30. What movies do you know every line to?
None. I have seen enough movies to make me forget such lines.
31. Has anyone told you a secret this week?
Yes!
32. Have you told someone else that secret?
Nope. I intend to keep that a secret.
33. Would you rather take the picture or be in it?
Both.
34. Do you wear flip-flops?
I love wearing them during Summer. Lately, I have been wearing flats.
35. If you could eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Pasta, salad and anything with rice.
36. What's the sweetest thing someone has done for you?
My Hon just staring at me for minutes and then he would whisper ILU in our own language (yes, we say ILU differently).
My youngest cousin, Patrick kissing me and ruining my blush on/cheek tint.
Insurance.
2. Where's the best place to eat a romantic dinner?
Antonio's in Tagaytay.
3. Last time you puked from drinking?
Just last Saturday.
4. Have you ever gotten drunk and danced on a bar?
Nope.
5. Name of your first grade teacher?
Miss Anita Bongolan, she taught me to appreciate English.
6. What are you doing right now?
Aside from answering these questions, I am at work taking my first break of the day.
7. What did you want to be when you were growing up?
I wanted to be just like my Mom and her love for Economics but I grew up loving anything but Economics, Accounting, History and Filipino.
8. How many colleges did you attend?
Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila and Ateneo de Manila University.
9. Why did you get the shirt that you have on right now?
Well, this is not really a shirt but a blouse. You see, I am in my business attire.
10. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you where would you go?
I have so many in my list but right now, I want to be in Bora-bora, French Polynesia with Hon or Cambodia with Mom and siblings.
11. First thought when the alarm went off this morning?
Darn! I snoozed my phone again and again. Haha.
12. Last thought before going to sleep last night?
May God keep me from evil.
13. Favorite hairstyle?
On me? I have always loved my hair to be this sexy short.
14. Favorite hairstyle of the opposite sex?
Short and clean.
--------------------------------------------------
1. How do you deal with sudden bouts of loneliness?
I cry for awhile then pray then write.
2. Do you bite your nails?
Nope.
3. Are you a jealous person?
I am a jealous girlfriend. I tend to be very nosey, wears my Delilah hat and gets quite angry at those women/girls who try to be extra close to my man. Don't dare me.
4. Are you allergic to anything?
Some seafoods - shrimp and crab.
5. What books, if any, have made you cry?
Tuesdays with Morrie and The Notebook.
6. Does it get annoying when somebody says they'll call you, but doesn't?
It depends on who this somebody is.
7. What is your favorite simple ice-cream flavor?
Baskin-Robbins' World class Chocolate.
8. Whose car were you in last...?
MGE's.
9. What would you rather be doing right now?
Sleeping. This kinda cold weather makes me wanna lie in bed and sleep all day.
10. What song lyrics, if any, are stuck in your head at the moment?
Incubus' The Warmth.
11. What did you dress up as for Halloween?
Nobody.
12. What is your favorite TV show?
House MD.
13. Do you get along better with the same or opposite sex?
Most of the time its the opposite sex but I have a good number of wonderful girl friends.
14. Can others make you cry easily?
As much as I hate to admit it, yes.
15. Who was the last person to piss you off?
Someone who is the closest.
16. Are you picky about spelling and grammar?
Super. I am OC too with how the piece looks like - proper capitalization and justified paragraph form. Ha! Sue me.
17. Do you pay attention to calories on the back of packages?
Nope. I can eat like there's no more tomorrow and don't gain weight.
18. If you could be any type of dress, what would you be?
Little sexy black dress.
19. How many hours of sleep do you need to function?
I have gotten used to not getting enough sleep and still function. Its a practice I have learned in college (PLM).
20. When was the last time you slept on the floor?
I don't remember myself sleeping on the floor.
21. Have you ever been attracted to someone, but not physically?
Never. I always get attracted to others physically (clean looking) and mentally (wits should blow me).
22. What are some things that are needed in a relationship?
Tons of love, respect and trust.
23. Do you like traveling?
I certainly do.
24. Would you ever date someone covered in tattoos?
Nope. I have always dated clean looking boys err men.
25. Do you believe the guy should pay on the first date?
Yes.
26. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?
Nope. I am content with my two ear piercings (one of each).
27. Which do you make: dreams or plans
Both.
28. Can you speak any languages other than English?
Filipino but I speak and express myself better in English - blame it on my environment and books I read.
29. What is your favorite salad dressing?
Vinaigrette, good ol' Asian and Caesar's.
30. What movies do you know every line to?
None. I have seen enough movies to make me forget such lines.
31. Has anyone told you a secret this week?
Yes!
32. Have you told someone else that secret?
Nope. I intend to keep that a secret.
33. Would you rather take the picture or be in it?
Both.
34. Do you wear flip-flops?
I love wearing them during Summer. Lately, I have been wearing flats.
35. If you could eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Pasta, salad and anything with rice.
36. What's the sweetest thing someone has done for you?
My Hon just staring at me for minutes and then he would whisper ILU in our own language (yes, we say ILU differently).
My youngest cousin, Patrick kissing me and ruining my blush on/cheek tint.
One Liner
All it takes for evil to riot is for some good men to do something and for everybody else to think only of Christmas shopping.
- Conrado de Quiros
- Conrado de Quiros
Monday, December 3, 2007
I Heart Kaka
It was only over the weekend when this boy caught my heart and I knew right there, I was smitten.
Kaka (fullname: Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite) was introduced to me (and the rest of the Makati BOL congregation) by Coach Ime last Sunday morning. While I have always liked David Beckham (who doesn't?), I never considered myself a football/soccer fan and never had the balls to watch such games either.
I googled Kaka and found out that he plays for A.C. Milan and is considered as one of the world's best football player. With his fame and extraordinary talent, what made me overly smitten by this boy is that he flamboyantly expresses his love for his Creator. I mean, he lives in Europe where it is almost bizarre to ever profess your faith and be a Christian. But this boy, being a famed 25 year old football player - never failed to give his Creator a glory He alone deserves.
I have attached some of Kaka's pictures showing him give glory to his Creator.
Kaka (fullname: Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite) was introduced to me (and the rest of the Makati BOL congregation) by Coach Ime last Sunday morning. While I have always liked David Beckham (who doesn't?), I never considered myself a football/soccer fan and never had the balls to watch such games either.
I googled Kaka and found out that he plays for A.C. Milan and is considered as one of the world's best football player. With his fame and extraordinary talent, what made me overly smitten by this boy is that he flamboyantly expresses his love for his Creator. I mean, he lives in Europe where it is almost bizarre to ever profess your faith and be a Christian. But this boy, being a famed 25 year old football player - never failed to give his Creator a glory He alone deserves.
I have attached some of Kaka's pictures showing him give glory to his Creator.
I love what one writer said about him, "I’m not a fan of public prayer. I think it is often hypocritical and self-glorifying. Even so, I can’t help but muse on the profound difference between LeBron James shouting “King James” and pounding his chest to celebrate himself after a big dunk and Kaka’ rejecting both the public’s adulation and the team’s celebration in favor of dropping to his knees and giving the glory to a higher king."
Without a doubt, I heart Kaka.
Without a doubt, I heart Kaka.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Serenity Prayer
God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the different.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His will;
That I may be reasonably happy int his life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the different.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His will;
That I may be reasonably happy int his life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
Friday, November 30, 2007
Wand Waving
Yey! I received my first ever Christmas e-card for the year!
Super thank you, Tophee! You made my day ha.
Promise, I'll write you a super long, handwritten letter like the old times before the week ends. Are you coming home this Holidays? Please say yes.
The Warmth
Do you think I should adhere
To that pressing new frontier
And leave in my wake a trail of fear?
Or should I hold my head up high
And throw a wrench in spokes by
Leaving the air behind me clear?
- Incubus
To that pressing new frontier
And leave in my wake a trail of fear?
Or should I hold my head up high
And throw a wrench in spokes by
Leaving the air behind me clear?
- Incubus
Halaga
What started with little lies has now grown into such a terrible heartache that almost nothing can beat - not even that lovely Greek! Spending the whole night arguing and taking blows were inarguably tiring. Dada was right, I should've listened and saved my myself from blows that are quite deafening.
It was around 3 in the morning when Dada's 3 and a half hour long litany finally ended. He started yakking while we were in the car, on our way home from Palacio de Maynila. And there I found myself painfully wondering when will these "boys" finally realize that I am worthy of something great.
This morning as I opened my mail - a friend, who is now based in the US, wrote something that made me cry like there's no more tomorrow. And it reads...
You see, I am a great and prayerful woman's daughter.
It was around 3 in the morning when Dada's 3 and a half hour long litany finally ended. He started yakking while we were in the car, on our way home from Palacio de Maynila. And there I found myself painfully wondering when will these "boys" finally realize that I am worthy of something great.
This morning as I opened my mail - a friend, who is now based in the US, wrote something that made me cry like there's no more tomorrow. And it reads...
Sa libu-libong pagkakataon na tayo'y nag-kasama
Iilang ulit palang kitang makitang masaya
Naiinis akong isipin na ginaganyan ka nya
Siguro ay hindi niya lang alam ang iyong
Tunay na halaga
Iilang ulit palang kitang makitang masaya
Naiinis akong isipin na ginaganyan ka nya
Siguro ay hindi niya lang alam ang iyong
Tunay na halaga
What can I say, pigs - no matter how cute and lovable they seem to be, are still pigs and will act like one. Its just sad that no matter what you do, some people will refuse to love you just the way you should be loved. Ha! Ever heard of some old senti lines that go - I cannot make you love me if you don't, you can't make your heart feel something it won't? So sounds family now to me.
But as always, I will grow up way ahead of those within my range and be a blessing to those who are far more suffering than I am.
But as always, I will grow up way ahead of those within my range and be a blessing to those who are far more suffering than I am.
You see, I am a great and prayerful woman's daughter.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Home Bound
DISCLAIMER: This piece is not for the impatient.
Rising on the wrong side of the bed has truly contributed so well in ruining the entire day. Tuesday was a terrible day and I did not quite see it coming.
Ever since I have plunged in the corporate pool back in 2003 (a month after graduation), I have always embraced the better learner side of me and would almost always be consumed by too much thinking and analysis to anticipate any setbacks. Ha! What can I say, I am an analyst - work and otherwise.
But yesterday was different.
It did not actually start this deep dark, it was when the Earthquake hit the metro - I so felt it. I got scared all together and could not compose myself even hours after that. You see, our office is located in the 29th floor of one of the tallest buildings along Ayala Avenue so I hope you get the picture. And then I was tapped to do a presentation about learning techniques due the next day. I caught myself sending endless sms and making phone calls to friends who could possibly help me digest such learning techniques! I ended up rushing to several bookstores hoping to find the best-bound pages I could possibly have.
Another catch is that it was raining so hard after my meet and bound pages hunting! As we should all know by now, when it rains - it was so effing hard to get a cab. These cab drivers suddenly became so choosy and would normally ask for a fixed, higher rate. Damn it!
I tried my "luck" on people within my strings to pick me up - making super numerous phone calls (I made 57) and none of them were effing answered. I was so helpless leaving me so marred and miserable.
In my mind I was chanting over and over - why is it hard to reach them when you're in an I-need-someone-to-pick-me-up-now kind of spot and why are they not even answering their damn phone? You can tell, I was furious. My limited mind can no longer fathom such a puzzle. I just wanted to get home and take a warm bath, for crying out loud!
Good Lord, please send me an earthly angel was my constant plea and He answered. Many thanks to Manong driver! He saved me from lunacy by confusing himself that I am I.R. (a local actress) and was even asking for an autograph! Hilarious!
Today is a new day, I suppose. I kicked some ass with my presentation and it did not hurt that I got an A for a rank.
Ha! So much for bad days.
Rising on the wrong side of the bed has truly contributed so well in ruining the entire day. Tuesday was a terrible day and I did not quite see it coming.
Ever since I have plunged in the corporate pool back in 2003 (a month after graduation), I have always embraced the better learner side of me and would almost always be consumed by too much thinking and analysis to anticipate any setbacks. Ha! What can I say, I am an analyst - work and otherwise.
But yesterday was different.
It did not actually start this deep dark, it was when the Earthquake hit the metro - I so felt it. I got scared all together and could not compose myself even hours after that. You see, our office is located in the 29th floor of one of the tallest buildings along Ayala Avenue so I hope you get the picture. And then I was tapped to do a presentation about learning techniques due the next day. I caught myself sending endless sms and making phone calls to friends who could possibly help me digest such learning techniques! I ended up rushing to several bookstores hoping to find the best-bound pages I could possibly have.
Another catch is that it was raining so hard after my meet and bound pages hunting! As we should all know by now, when it rains - it was so effing hard to get a cab. These cab drivers suddenly became so choosy and would normally ask for a fixed, higher rate. Damn it!
I tried my "luck" on people within my strings to pick me up - making super numerous phone calls (I made 57) and none of them were effing answered. I was so helpless leaving me so marred and miserable.
In my mind I was chanting over and over - why is it hard to reach them when you're in an I-need-someone-to-pick-me-up-now kind of spot and why are they not even answering their damn phone? You can tell, I was furious. My limited mind can no longer fathom such a puzzle. I just wanted to get home and take a warm bath, for crying out loud!
Good Lord, please send me an earthly angel was my constant plea and He answered. Many thanks to Manong driver! He saved me from lunacy by confusing himself that I am I.R. (a local actress) and was even asking for an autograph! Hilarious!
Today is a new day, I suppose. I kicked some ass with my presentation and it did not hurt that I got an A for a rank.
Ha! So much for bad days.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Labyrinth
My alter ego was right when she realized that she is not putting too much trust on some people within her strings. She just simply cannot completely entrust her whole being to a fellow flawed soul - she just find it too hard.
Time and time again, she would resist the call of this hymn but at once she reaches the bottom of this abyss, she would do things her own and almost always trust nobody but He, who is bigger than anyone else.
Digging deeper and hoping to find a quick remedy, she just knew how terrible it was when someone really dear would lie and hide almost all the time from her - keeping her in such a dark, murky place. Yet she forgives and hold on to that something so great that her eyes glee at the moment she feels the warmth of its embrace.
This not-too-trusting attitude is never innate. It all started when a series of unfortunate lies resurfaced in 2004 and since then, she almost vowed that she would not be the same doormat little girl ever again. While she gives her almost all to those she vowed to keep, she would still venture into some little feat - proving to her audience that while she appears fragile, she's no nincompoop and her brain can compute and connect the dots quite very well.
This conundrum is becoming extra difficult for a mind game but she trusts that she would eventually find her way out and emerge a victor.
Time and time again, she would resist the call of this hymn but at once she reaches the bottom of this abyss, she would do things her own and almost always trust nobody but He, who is bigger than anyone else.
Digging deeper and hoping to find a quick remedy, she just knew how terrible it was when someone really dear would lie and hide almost all the time from her - keeping her in such a dark, murky place. Yet she forgives and hold on to that something so great that her eyes glee at the moment she feels the warmth of its embrace.
This not-too-trusting attitude is never innate. It all started when a series of unfortunate lies resurfaced in 2004 and since then, she almost vowed that she would not be the same doormat little girl ever again. While she gives her almost all to those she vowed to keep, she would still venture into some little feat - proving to her audience that while she appears fragile, she's no nincompoop and her brain can compute and connect the dots quite very well.
This conundrum is becoming extra difficult for a mind game but she trusts that she would eventually find her way out and emerge a victor.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Casanova's Love
Having been out for almost a week and is now sporting pretty tan lines, I know there are so much writing in tow. There are so many insights I would want to unleash but for some reason, I am afraid I cannot publish such thoughts.
But I can be discreet.
Over the weekend, an old friend asked me out on a date. It is common knowledge that I have been in a relationship with my beau for 4 years now and it surprised me that this old friend bluntly asked me out on a date - just like that. I was totally caught off guard, so I just laughed it off and politely declined his offer.
After such temporary silence, he called me again - almost nagging me why we should go out and be merry like what old friends do. I listened to him as he paraded all his good intentions and I was amazed at how he almost begged to win my yes for a fancy dinner date. It was a pretty much an old conversation but what bothered me now is when he said that I am a two-timer magnet. He, for some reason, cannot compute in his mind why am I being faithful when I always end up being with a two-timer.
To be tagged a two-timer magnet is a very bitter pill to swallow but I am quite good now in ignoring such name-calling.
You see, I know what its like to be betrayed for I have been there so many times and I am telling you, it was a very narrow and difficult road but that will not make me stoop and do the same things. I am not going to use that as an excuse for me not to stay faithful. A wrong cannot be corrected by another wrong, I was told by my Mom.
People can call me "pity" for deciding not to be a loose woman for all I care. I just simply intend to be faithful to the love I promised to keep.
To be different has always been my choice.
But I can be discreet.
Over the weekend, an old friend asked me out on a date. It is common knowledge that I have been in a relationship with my beau for 4 years now and it surprised me that this old friend bluntly asked me out on a date - just like that. I was totally caught off guard, so I just laughed it off and politely declined his offer.
After such temporary silence, he called me again - almost nagging me why we should go out and be merry like what old friends do. I listened to him as he paraded all his good intentions and I was amazed at how he almost begged to win my yes for a fancy dinner date. It was a pretty much an old conversation but what bothered me now is when he said that I am a two-timer magnet. He, for some reason, cannot compute in his mind why am I being faithful when I always end up being with a two-timer.
To be tagged a two-timer magnet is a very bitter pill to swallow but I am quite good now in ignoring such name-calling.
You see, I know what its like to be betrayed for I have been there so many times and I am telling you, it was a very narrow and difficult road but that will not make me stoop and do the same things. I am not going to use that as an excuse for me not to stay faithful. A wrong cannot be corrected by another wrong, I was told by my Mom.
People can call me "pity" for deciding not to be a loose woman for all I care. I just simply intend to be faithful to the love I promised to keep.
To be different has always been my choice.
Dangerous Lies
Why do some people pretend to be someone they're not?
Why would someone lie to death when it is quite evident that lies will find their way to be found out?
Why is it so hard to be honest about everything?
The danger of telling lies is that the day will come when no one will ever believe you anymore. And that is scary.
Why would someone lie to death when it is quite evident that lies will find their way to be found out?
Why is it so hard to be honest about everything?
The danger of telling lies is that the day will come when no one will ever believe you anymore. And that is scary.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Graffiti
Its been more than an hour and I caught myself just staring on this blank screen. Forgive me for this but I am running out of something really good and interesting to write about. But then again these never fail to interest me.
color theory.
enticing conversation.
real people.
sitting outside.
cold noses.
concert in the shower.
bust a move.
siblings.
books.
wine coolers.
laughing until my cheeks hurt.
being close.
missing those that are far.
long walks.
warm baths.
subtitles.
lying in bed.
movies.
perfect pecks.
hot smooches.
blankets.
good friends.
dreaming.
holding hands.
being warm.
thumping hearts.
old windows.
memory boxes.
pink.
paintings.
running into people at the market.
singing.
learning.
flip flops.
shoes and more shoes.
cheek kissing.
adventures to everywhere.
dancing.
my bed.
being a classy Delilah.
walking.
the morning glory outside of my room window.
tears.
delicate kisses.
reunion.
glasses.
road trips.
the good book.
surprises.
delicate kisses.
paint pens.
crayons.
sun roofs.
midnight expeditions.
hugs.
really good hugs.
some weird but pleasant sounds.
crisp sound of dry leaves.
gold.
pearl.
Elisier.
unexpected phone calls.
no make up look.
strangers.
decorated mix cds.
sms.
tact.
snail mails.
e-mail.
honesty.
faithfulness.
new things.
old things.
stacks of movie tickets.
my mobile phone.
chilly digits.
journal.
nice tops.
dyslexia.
feeling small and tall.
cleaning.
cheek bones.
pointed nose.
arched brows.
true beauty.
quiet time.
kids.
Great Providence.
written phone messages.
white. white. white.
finding lost things.
getting extra tan.
sun.
beaches.
people who care.
colored candy.
unconditional love.
enticing conversation.
real people.
sitting outside.
cold noses.
concert in the shower.
bust a move.
siblings.
books.
wine coolers.
laughing until my cheeks hurt.
being close.
missing those that are far.
long walks.
warm baths.
subtitles.
lying in bed.
movies.
perfect pecks.
hot smooches.
blankets.
good friends.
dreaming.
holding hands.
being warm.
thumping hearts.
old windows.
memory boxes.
pink.
paintings.
running into people at the market.
singing.
learning.
flip flops.
shoes and more shoes.
cheek kissing.
adventures to everywhere.
dancing.
my bed.
being a classy Delilah.
walking.
the morning glory outside of my room window.
tears.
delicate kisses.
reunion.
glasses.
road trips.
the good book.
surprises.
delicate kisses.
paint pens.
crayons.
sun roofs.
midnight expeditions.
hugs.
really good hugs.
some weird but pleasant sounds.
crisp sound of dry leaves.
gold.
pearl.
Elisier.
unexpected phone calls.
no make up look.
strangers.
decorated mix cds.
sms.
tact.
snail mails.
e-mail.
honesty.
faithfulness.
new things.
old things.
stacks of movie tickets.
my mobile phone.
chilly digits.
journal.
nice tops.
dyslexia.
feeling small and tall.
cleaning.
cheek bones.
pointed nose.
arched brows.
true beauty.
quiet time.
kids.
Great Providence.
written phone messages.
white. white. white.
finding lost things.
getting extra tan.
sun.
beaches.
people who care.
colored candy.
unconditional love.
So there. Sue me!
Friday, November 16, 2007
Deliverable
I made a very big decision and felt really lofty.
It took me several weeks before I finally had the spunk to throw away some of the clutters that has kept me from really moving forward. I lovingly dug my "baul" and looked at those things which never failed to remind me of my mistakes, hurts and triumphs and of those from whom I loved in the past.
I have written several times about how awful my day(s) have become because I let it be. I understand that it is not the issues that caused me to become some sort of a person I am not supposed to be but it is with how I respond to whatever fire thrown on my face.
As I dug, I caught myself getting a bit distracted of such harsh emotions that I had to wail to release such. I thought to myself, I let these things keep me from really moving on and from being a much better person so, I have to make a stand and free myself from such chains. I know I am doing the right thing as what Paul said in Ephesians - "You were taught, with regard to your former life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds."
I was still in my shilly-shally mode as I went out of our house, watched these clutters get burned and saw myself free from future "digging".
I know I am not yet completely free but I already took the first step.
A good start - deliverable indeed.
It took me several weeks before I finally had the spunk to throw away some of the clutters that has kept me from really moving forward. I lovingly dug my "baul" and looked at those things which never failed to remind me of my mistakes, hurts and triumphs and of those from whom I loved in the past.
I have written several times about how awful my day(s) have become because I let it be. I understand that it is not the issues that caused me to become some sort of a person I am not supposed to be but it is with how I respond to whatever fire thrown on my face.
As I dug, I caught myself getting a bit distracted of such harsh emotions that I had to wail to release such. I thought to myself, I let these things keep me from really moving on and from being a much better person so, I have to make a stand and free myself from such chains. I know I am doing the right thing as what Paul said in Ephesians - "You were taught, with regard to your former life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds."
I was still in my shilly-shally mode as I went out of our house, watched these clutters get burned and saw myself free from future "digging".
I know I am not yet completely free but I already took the first step.
A good start - deliverable indeed.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Worthy of the Greeks
Legion of nights ago, Hon and I watched Humor Has It. The flick was an ok-ok film but what made it remarkably astounding for me is the way some of the words or scenes touched my sometimes confused mind and disgusted soul.
Not that I am proud of it but our relationship has gone through sundry tests and fire worthy of the Greeks - caused by others and our own blunders too. Among the many fluffs, my "favorite" is the classic betrayal incidents that caused me so much - numerous sleepless days and nights, never ending cry-ola moments, several meet ups with friends just so I can unleash the "trouble" the "mild" betrayal has caused me and not to mention a certain trauma. Having been betrayed by somebody you dreamed of spending the rest of your life with is a major knock out like no other. But I have learned to accept that the ones you loved the most are those who can hurt you the most, that we all have fallen and committed mistakes.
After all the drama, soap opera like dialogue and shedding buckets of tears, we both have managed to learn from our mistakes - making sure that we don't commit the same mistakes again. Several times as we journey hand in hand, I'd get tempted to let go and embrace single blessedness but as always, my man refuses to give up. To him, our relationship has a great chance of lasting a lifetime - with the quality of our daily conversations, the sacrifices we have chosen to make, the tests, laughter and the tears. We are already one, as he would put it - "there's no you or me, only us". And like what he wrote in his testimonial for me - "nobody has ever loved me the way she does."
Going back to the movie, there was a scene there wherein Sarah (played by Jennifer Aniston) was asking her Dad some questions about the time when her Mom went to Mexico and slept with another man the week before they tie the knot. She asked her Dad what made her Mom went back to Pasadena and married her Dad. And he lovingly answered "because she loves me and she said that she can build a life with me."
That statement hit me the hardest. Now it is really clear to me, that the reason why Hon had chosen for my hands back simply because he loves me and is willing to build a life with me as he also continually reminds me that love is a commitment - despite and in spite of.
Not that I am proud of it but our relationship has gone through sundry tests and fire worthy of the Greeks - caused by others and our own blunders too. Among the many fluffs, my "favorite" is the classic betrayal incidents that caused me so much - numerous sleepless days and nights, never ending cry-ola moments, several meet ups with friends just so I can unleash the "trouble" the "mild" betrayal has caused me and not to mention a certain trauma. Having been betrayed by somebody you dreamed of spending the rest of your life with is a major knock out like no other. But I have learned to accept that the ones you loved the most are those who can hurt you the most, that we all have fallen and committed mistakes.
After all the drama, soap opera like dialogue and shedding buckets of tears, we both have managed to learn from our mistakes - making sure that we don't commit the same mistakes again. Several times as we journey hand in hand, I'd get tempted to let go and embrace single blessedness but as always, my man refuses to give up. To him, our relationship has a great chance of lasting a lifetime - with the quality of our daily conversations, the sacrifices we have chosen to make, the tests, laughter and the tears. We are already one, as he would put it - "there's no you or me, only us". And like what he wrote in his testimonial for me - "nobody has ever loved me the way she does."
Going back to the movie, there was a scene there wherein Sarah (played by Jennifer Aniston) was asking her Dad some questions about the time when her Mom went to Mexico and slept with another man the week before they tie the knot. She asked her Dad what made her Mom went back to Pasadena and married her Dad. And he lovingly answered "because she loves me and she said that she can build a life with me."
That statement hit me the hardest. Now it is really clear to me, that the reason why Hon had chosen for my hands back simply because he loves me and is willing to build a life with me as he also continually reminds me that love is a commitment - despite and in spite of.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Moving Forward
Up before dawn -
Feeling heavy and so out.
With sweat pouring;
As December wind kisses such cheeks.
In silence, almost moving;
Both hands are clasped.
Lifting a foot -
Hoping nobody would notice.
Feeling a very cold hand;
Almost swearing.
Leaving this pneuma dumbfounded;
Dithers!
To utter is to be hushed;
Yet to tell the truth is a must.
Just look around;
You'll see, this is the best you'll ever have.
Feeling heavy and so out.
With sweat pouring;
As December wind kisses such cheeks.
In silence, almost moving;
Both hands are clasped.
Lifting a foot -
Hoping nobody would notice.
Feeling a very cold hand;
Almost swearing.
Leaving this pneuma dumbfounded;
Dithers!
To utter is to be hushed;
Yet to tell the truth is a must.
Just look around;
You'll see, this is the best you'll ever have.
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Forever
You don't know what you got, until it's gone
And you don't know what you lost, until it's gone
And when somebody that you know goes away (and dies)
They're gone !
They're gone !
They're gone !
Forever !
- Limp Bizkit
And you don't know what you lost, until it's gone
And when somebody that you know goes away (and dies)
They're gone !
They're gone !
They're gone !
Forever !
- Limp Bizkit
Monday, November 12, 2007
Life Cyclone
My hands are down signaling that I am completely agreeing with a rather old statement that reads - we are all a work in progress. Simply because, we are. If we are all done with our supposed work here on Earth, then why are we still here? I have chosen to believe that I am still alive after all the heart wrenching trials I have been through because God isn't done with me yet.
Based on mere observation, our everyday is, was and will always be blessed with trials that come in different shapes - some come in handy and some don't. My faith has been tested so many times already, I sometimes stumble and would want to give up but His grace is always good enough for me to get back to where I am supposed to be - a race I lovingly called Life.
While we are all a work in progress, I am having a hard time dealing with lies - white, gray and heck, whatever the color you may want to give this, but at the end of the day, it is still a lie. A lie is a lie. Period.
We can all continue hiding where one is most comfortable in, have a secret life and then later say, "I have been forgiven so there's no need for me to discuss my wrong doing and it is between me and my Maker." Of course, who wants to discuss their mistakes with a human being? But let's not forget that that mistake - no matter how incredible the story behind that mistake is, will always have a dirty effect to the other person. Did you ever ask for the person's forgiveness and sincerely apologize? Or did you just say you're sorry just because you were found out?
Please don't read me wrong. I am not perfect. All I am saying is, every time we said yes or no to something - this decision will affect somebody.
I have fallen short a lot of times already and it is by His grace that I am forgiven - not even because I deserve it. In those times when I felt weak and angry about almost everything, I would complain until that complaining almost destroyed the relationship I promised to keep. The moment I have chosen to complain and yank about both petty and important things, I give no room for the other wonderful things that has ever happened to me for appreciation. In those times when I become selfish, I give no room for myself to love and care for others more and vice versa.
We may not notice it but we affect somebody, somewhere - by our "little" actions. And that impact will soon affect us, again.
Such is the cycle of life.
Based on mere observation, our everyday is, was and will always be blessed with trials that come in different shapes - some come in handy and some don't. My faith has been tested so many times already, I sometimes stumble and would want to give up but His grace is always good enough for me to get back to where I am supposed to be - a race I lovingly called Life.
While we are all a work in progress, I am having a hard time dealing with lies - white, gray and heck, whatever the color you may want to give this, but at the end of the day, it is still a lie. A lie is a lie. Period.
We can all continue hiding where one is most comfortable in, have a secret life and then later say, "I have been forgiven so there's no need for me to discuss my wrong doing and it is between me and my Maker." Of course, who wants to discuss their mistakes with a human being? But let's not forget that that mistake - no matter how incredible the story behind that mistake is, will always have a dirty effect to the other person. Did you ever ask for the person's forgiveness and sincerely apologize? Or did you just say you're sorry just because you were found out?
Please don't read me wrong. I am not perfect. All I am saying is, every time we said yes or no to something - this decision will affect somebody.
I have fallen short a lot of times already and it is by His grace that I am forgiven - not even because I deserve it. In those times when I felt weak and angry about almost everything, I would complain until that complaining almost destroyed the relationship I promised to keep. The moment I have chosen to complain and yank about both petty and important things, I give no room for the other wonderful things that has ever happened to me for appreciation. In those times when I become selfish, I give no room for myself to love and care for others more and vice versa.
We may not notice it but we affect somebody, somewhere - by our "little" actions. And that impact will soon affect us, again.
Such is the cycle of life.
Friday, November 9, 2007
Butterflies Flee
One of the many things I will always be thankful for is that I was born at the time when to talk is accepted and it does not hurt that I was raised by such wonderful couple who taught me to value relationships, not to lie and encouraged me to express - among others.
Last night, I had a quite long one-on-one session with my Mom - and it was terrible, I had to share something very personal and invited her to pour some wisdom that time has ripened. In between my words, were sobs and hiccups. She did not talk much, she just listened patiently and made me feel that she's all ears. What stunned me is that, she talked and hugged me like she's not my Mom (I mean this in a very good way). She did not show wrath or any negative vibe towards my offender - instead, she reminded me that we all make mistakes and such mistakes can cause other people to get hurt. Sad, sad process but that is the world and we make a difference by changing how we react.
Unbelievable.
After that talk, I prayed so hard that may I be given the courage to face this. You see, I have been betrayed so many times already and I was pretty much convinced that it will be hard for me to trust again. But He is God. I mean, nothing is impossible to Him - we just have to ask. I did and He answered. The experience was more than what my limited mind can ever fathom.
I woke up today feeling so loved and blessed. How can I not forgive those who have offended me big time when I was forgiven and saved first by JC?
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many time shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
- Matthew 18:21-22
Last night, I had a quite long one-on-one session with my Mom - and it was terrible, I had to share something very personal and invited her to pour some wisdom that time has ripened. In between my words, were sobs and hiccups. She did not talk much, she just listened patiently and made me feel that she's all ears. What stunned me is that, she talked and hugged me like she's not my Mom (I mean this in a very good way). She did not show wrath or any negative vibe towards my offender - instead, she reminded me that we all make mistakes and such mistakes can cause other people to get hurt. Sad, sad process but that is the world and we make a difference by changing how we react.
Unbelievable.
After that talk, I prayed so hard that may I be given the courage to face this. You see, I have been betrayed so many times already and I was pretty much convinced that it will be hard for me to trust again. But He is God. I mean, nothing is impossible to Him - we just have to ask. I did and He answered. The experience was more than what my limited mind can ever fathom.
I woke up today feeling so loved and blessed. How can I not forgive those who have offended me big time when I was forgiven and saved first by JC?
Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many time shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
- Matthew 18:21-22
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Tragedy's Favorite
Something I just found out -
Broke my heart into pieces.
How did I not see that before?
Too trusting, I must have been.
Did not bother to ask for awhile;
I should have paused and breathe.
Maybe, I was too young and easy;
Knew nothing much about life.
My heart bleeds;
Too hurting, I am. That I know.
Did I drag myself to be here?
To be fooled since day one.
I pinched myself so hard;
But 'twas nothing compared to my inner hurt.
Clouded and numb.
I have become darn tragedy's favorite.
"... and you will be sure that your sin will found you out."
Numbers 32:23
Broke my heart into pieces.
How did I not see that before?
Too trusting, I must have been.
Did not bother to ask for awhile;
I should have paused and breathe.
Maybe, I was too young and easy;
Knew nothing much about life.
My heart bleeds;
Too hurting, I am. That I know.
Did I drag myself to be here?
To be fooled since day one.
I pinched myself so hard;
But 'twas nothing compared to my inner hurt.
Clouded and numb.
I have become darn tragedy's favorite.
"... and you will be sure that your sin will found you out."
Numbers 32:23
Monday, November 5, 2007
Be Somebody
I want to be somebody
I want to make a difference,
For we all are children of the Mother.
I want to be somebody
I want to make a difference,
For we all are children of the Father.
- Paula Cole
I want to make a difference,
For we all are children of the Mother.
I want to be somebody
I want to make a difference,
For we all are children of the Father.
- Paula Cole
Friday, November 2, 2007
Cheap Thrills
I haven't been quite laughing so hard lately but these strips did the trick for me - today.
Rocking Chair
Can't stand myself;
An invisible man held me so tight.
Water is rising;
Got my mind on something else.
Sway as you please.
An invisible man held me so tight.
Water is rising;
Got my mind on something else.
Sway as you please.
Be Still
Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.
Be still, my soul: when dearest friends depart,
And all is darkened in the vale of tears,
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrow and thy fears.
Be still, my soul: thy Jesus can repay
From His own fullness all He takes away.
Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.
Be still, my soul: begin the song of praise
On earth, be leaving, to Thy Lord on high;
Acknowledge Him in all thy words and ways,
So shall He view thee with a well pleased eye.
Be still, my soul: the Sun of life divine
Through passing clouds shall but more brightly shine.
"Be still, and know that I am God."
- Psalm 46:10
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.
Be still, my soul: when dearest friends depart,
And all is darkened in the vale of tears,
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrow and thy fears.
Be still, my soul: thy Jesus can repay
From His own fullness all He takes away.
Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.
Be still, my soul: begin the song of praise
On earth, be leaving, to Thy Lord on high;
Acknowledge Him in all thy words and ways,
So shall He view thee with a well pleased eye.
Be still, my soul: the Sun of life divine
Through passing clouds shall but more brightly shine.
"Be still, and know that I am God."
- Psalm 46:10
Thursday, November 1, 2007
My Departed
Today, as we "celebrate" All Saint's Day - I am reminded of how my departed loved ones influenced me and my actions.
This page is for them.
Tatay - you left long before I was born yet your goodness and stories about you still linger amongst your 14 lovely grandkids.
Lola Carlota - I was tasked to change your dress and prepare your food when I was 6. Taking good care of you gave me a sense of fulfillment. It was sad that you left when I was 8, I still know how you sound like.
Lola Mariana - I loved Saturdays and Alabang Hills because of you.
Lolo Piping - you always delighted me with your pasalubongs from Antipolo and you made quite a nickname for me, Kata.
Lolo Sergio - my childhood was ever fun because of you. Your stories about "tikbalang" scared me and Macky but your "kakulitans" and our fascinating trips and long walks around the neighborhood still make me smile upto this very day.
Lolo Dunay - of all my Dad's brothers, you're the coolest one and we still sometimes talk about your funny antics - lalo na when you're drunk.
Tata - you're funny, serious, sometimes tolerant kind and distinct cough are all forever etched in me.
Nana Pacing - too many things to say about you but your warm hugs and "tahan na" are the best.
Luigi - you helped me appreciate the Ateneo way and our road trips are priceless.
Mikael - you calling me "cool" and "pare" everytime I cry or had a fight with my Dad when we were both a lot younger, helped me toughen up inside.
Adda - God is ever alive in your life, I saw it. Thank you for rebuking me when I needed it.
Tita Choi - badminton will never be the same without your powerful smash.
Chinggy - you are definitely one of the smartest kids I've ever met - you knew all the countries (and their capitals) in the world, you knew the Solar system and you can do simple math when you were 4. You helped me appreciate kids even more.
Bin - my forever pakner. I am thankful to have been blessed by your wonderful friendship.
A minute of prayer for you.
This page is for them.
Tatay - you left long before I was born yet your goodness and stories about you still linger amongst your 14 lovely grandkids.
Lola Carlota - I was tasked to change your dress and prepare your food when I was 6. Taking good care of you gave me a sense of fulfillment. It was sad that you left when I was 8, I still know how you sound like.
Lola Mariana - I loved Saturdays and Alabang Hills because of you.
Lolo Piping - you always delighted me with your pasalubongs from Antipolo and you made quite a nickname for me, Kata.
Lolo Sergio - my childhood was ever fun because of you. Your stories about "tikbalang" scared me and Macky but your "kakulitans" and our fascinating trips and long walks around the neighborhood still make me smile upto this very day.
Lolo Dunay - of all my Dad's brothers, you're the coolest one and we still sometimes talk about your funny antics - lalo na when you're drunk.
Tata - you're funny, serious, sometimes tolerant kind and distinct cough are all forever etched in me.
Nana Pacing - too many things to say about you but your warm hugs and "tahan na" are the best.
Luigi - you helped me appreciate the Ateneo way and our road trips are priceless.
Mikael - you calling me "cool" and "pare" everytime I cry or had a fight with my Dad when we were both a lot younger, helped me toughen up inside.
Adda - God is ever alive in your life, I saw it. Thank you for rebuking me when I needed it.
Tita Choi - badminton will never be the same without your powerful smash.
Chinggy - you are definitely one of the smartest kids I've ever met - you knew all the countries (and their capitals) in the world, you knew the Solar system and you can do simple math when you were 4. You helped me appreciate kids even more.
Bin - my forever pakner. I am thankful to have been blessed by your wonderful friendship.
A minute of prayer for you.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Sweet Honesty
Silence is an option now;
Keep mum; don't say a word.
When lying does not fit;
Unacceptable.
At night, such lies haunt me;
Shoo, I'd say and for awhile I am not afloat.
But when these senses get back from the dead;
Fears and doubts kick in.
To forgive is easy -
To forget is a different story.
How well can you give trust;
Doubting what and when is the truth ever coming out.
Such lies and secret lives -
Spare me.
I only want some sweet honesty;
Please give it to me.
Keep mum; don't say a word.
When lying does not fit;
Unacceptable.
At night, such lies haunt me;
Shoo, I'd say and for awhile I am not afloat.
But when these senses get back from the dead;
Fears and doubts kick in.
To forgive is easy -
To forget is a different story.
How well can you give trust;
Doubting what and when is the truth ever coming out.
Such lies and secret lives -
Spare me.
I only want some sweet honesty;
Please give it to me.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Ananias' Kiss
Cover and wrap your fears;
Hide and then lie.
Too much pretension -
Too many denials, I am about to puke.
An overkill;
A big slap on my olive face.
But who cares?
You don't either.
Open your thick lips -
I am not looking.
One can never be sure;
Are you about to pretend some more?
Ha! Whack me.
Hide and then lie.
Too much pretension -
Too many denials, I am about to puke.
An overkill;
A big slap on my olive face.
But who cares?
You don't either.
Open your thick lips -
I am not looking.
One can never be sure;
Are you about to pretend some more?
Ha! Whack me.
Pardon Me
In the face of this mockery of forgiveness, there is a reason for resentment. According to sociologists Murphy and Hampton, the primary value defended by resentment is self-respect. A person who does not resent moral injuries done to him is almost necessarily a person lacking in self-respect. The land of the free has been forced to spread its legs for a mustached criminal with a pompadour, and then rewards that same man with a handshake and a kiss. So he walks away with a smirk, the same way so many of the men and women who violated the country have, so much so that rape is something we expect. So we rail at the pinpricks, condemn the Malu Fernandezes, petition the producers of “Desperate Housewives,” in the hope that we can get some of that lost dignity. And that’s well and good, it proves we’re still alive—but are doctors and OFWs the only people we’re willing to stand up for?
By all means, let us resent—resent the moral injury against the country, resent the arrogance that assumes we are so lacking in ego that we care nothing for our dignity. Resentment is both a protest against injustice and a defense of self-respect. We’re the battered wives who take every blow and forgive the drunken louts who smile at us the next morning. We’re the admiring crowd that steps aside for the tall woman with a thousand shoes. What Nietzsche says applies to the Filipino—here, forgiveness is a vice, not a virtue.
This pardon does not mean stability, or healing, or justice. It is Estrada’s middle finger shoved up the country’s collective consciousness, but it’s happened so often that it feels almost normal.
- Patricia Evangelista
By all means, let us resent—resent the moral injury against the country, resent the arrogance that assumes we are so lacking in ego that we care nothing for our dignity. Resentment is both a protest against injustice and a defense of self-respect. We’re the battered wives who take every blow and forgive the drunken louts who smile at us the next morning. We’re the admiring crowd that steps aside for the tall woman with a thousand shoes. What Nietzsche says applies to the Filipino—here, forgiveness is a vice, not a virtue.
This pardon does not mean stability, or healing, or justice. It is Estrada’s middle finger shoved up the country’s collective consciousness, but it’s happened so often that it feels almost normal.
- Patricia Evangelista
Monday, October 29, 2007
Heaven's Gifts and Presents
Such gifts and presents -
All wrapped up - yes, with ribbons.
Different shapes and forms, all they come.
Blues and all those hues - humor me.
Doubts and cries filled my air -
For awhile, I could not breathe;
Until, Somebody heard me scream,
And He surprised me over the weekend.
Golden girl is in the middle of nowhere -
Asked too many questions;
Until that Blondie man with this Aussie accent -
Waved his hand and did a trick.
All too sudden, I can breathe again -
You can see it, I am smiling no end.
All wrapped up - yes, with ribbons.
Different shapes and forms, all they come.
Blues and all those hues - humor me.
Doubts and cries filled my air -
For awhile, I could not breathe;
Until, Somebody heard me scream,
And He surprised me over the weekend.
Golden girl is in the middle of nowhere -
Asked too many questions;
Until that Blondie man with this Aussie accent -
Waved his hand and did a trick.
All too sudden, I can breathe again -
You can see it, I am smiling no end.
Heaven's gifts and presents -
Humor me again and again.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Such is Life
Okay, I know I am not always have the patience to do all the texting (see, I am not a text addict) but I am more than thankful to find out that after being not in my super best for the past few days (my temperature reached 40), there are still a good number of people who bombarded me with several getwellsoon kind of text messages.
I am currently out of danger and in quite a good shape - almost but not quite. I still sniff like crazy and am having a hard time talking now - my voice is at its worst! I sound like a boy!
The next few lines are going to be a bit cheesy but let me tell you that I can die anytime now knowing that there are more people within my string who actually cares. Sounds really good.
And I am smiling again - but not for long, my better half is also very under the weather and is in the hospital. I am beginning to wear that worry wart hat, what can I do - I worry about the people I love the most!
Oh good Lord, please don't let me hate those mosquitoes.
I am currently out of danger and in quite a good shape - almost but not quite. I still sniff like crazy and am having a hard time talking now - my voice is at its worst! I sound like a boy!
The next few lines are going to be a bit cheesy but let me tell you that I can die anytime now knowing that there are more people within my string who actually cares. Sounds really good.
And I am smiling again - but not for long, my better half is also very under the weather and is in the hospital. I am beginning to wear that worry wart hat, what can I do - I worry about the people I love the most!
Oh good Lord, please don't let me hate those mosquitoes.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Waiting in Vain
But I know, now, that I'm way down on your line,
But the waiting feel is fine:
So don't treat me like a puppet on a string,
'Cause I know I have to do my thing.
Don't talk to me as if you think I'm dumb;
- Bob Marley
But the waiting feel is fine:
So don't treat me like a puppet on a string,
'Cause I know I have to do my thing.
Don't talk to me as if you think I'm dumb;
- Bob Marley
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Silly Weather
Under the silly weather;
Oh yes, that's her place now.
Fighting a good fight everyday;
Trying to wear her best all the time.
Under the silly weather;
She's been battling with.
She can resist this;
But for how long? She knows not.
Under the silly weather;
Is what they use as an excuse.
To do things they think is "best" for her;
Not thinking it stings her like hell.
Under the silly weather;
She finds her strength in it.
She becomes more than herself;
Different from what others perceived her to be.
That fine day will come;
When you'll finally see her through.
You'll realize that she's beyond what your eyes can see;
She's more than that girl under the silly weather.
Oh yes, that's her place now.
Fighting a good fight everyday;
Trying to wear her best all the time.
Under the silly weather;
She's been battling with.
She can resist this;
But for how long? She knows not.
Under the silly weather;
Is what they use as an excuse.
To do things they think is "best" for her;
Not thinking it stings her like hell.
Under the silly weather;
She finds her strength in it.
She becomes more than herself;
Different from what others perceived her to be.
That fine day will come;
When you'll finally see her through.
You'll realize that she's beyond what your eyes can see;
She's more than that girl under the silly weather.
Freedom Writers
One boring Saturday morning, I've decided to watch Freedom Writers.
I've seen, read and heard lots of stories like these before - you know, teachers making a difference in his/her students' lives and for the nth time, this movie has moved me at point or another. I saw myself crying like crazy in some of the scenes. I can still remember how the nurse looked at me when he saw me sniffing like mad.
Anyway, Freedom Writers is a film about a first time English teacher who was tasked to handle freshmen high schoolers that later on we found out has their own stories to tell. These "kids" belong to some gang ranging from Latino, Black, Chinese Cambodian and White - catch is, they all hate each other and will protect only their own. At one point or another, you'd see how these "kids" disrespect those who belong to a gang different from his/her. It was horrible.
Teacher Erin may have kept her cool for sometime, she eventually lost it when one of her students draws a "funny" face of one of her black students. She bluntly put her students' gang in shame when she told them about the Holocaust. And since then, her passion to help these "kids" change never ceased and they responded well - moved by her, well - passion.
While Teacher Erin or Miss G. to her students is busy helping out these kids, her marriage is put to test and eventually, it crumbles and her husband left. All these happen and I have realized that sometimes, it takes everything to make something.
Amidst all the drama, this is a story of how an ordinary person touched each of her students' lives and gave them a spark of hope that all is not lost.
I've seen, read and heard lots of stories like these before - you know, teachers making a difference in his/her students' lives and for the nth time, this movie has moved me at point or another. I saw myself crying like crazy in some of the scenes. I can still remember how the nurse looked at me when he saw me sniffing like mad.
Anyway, Freedom Writers is a film about a first time English teacher who was tasked to handle freshmen high schoolers that later on we found out has their own stories to tell. These "kids" belong to some gang ranging from Latino, Black, Chinese Cambodian and White - catch is, they all hate each other and will protect only their own. At one point or another, you'd see how these "kids" disrespect those who belong to a gang different from his/her. It was horrible.
Teacher Erin may have kept her cool for sometime, she eventually lost it when one of her students draws a "funny" face of one of her black students. She bluntly put her students' gang in shame when she told them about the Holocaust. And since then, her passion to help these "kids" change never ceased and they responded well - moved by her, well - passion.
While Teacher Erin or Miss G. to her students is busy helping out these kids, her marriage is put to test and eventually, it crumbles and her husband left. All these happen and I have realized that sometimes, it takes everything to make something.
Amidst all the drama, this is a story of how an ordinary person touched each of her students' lives and gave them a spark of hope that all is not lost.
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