This piece was inspired after hearing 2 respectable personalities talk about their first loves. No, boring as it may sound but the talk was not really about their first love as in of the opposite sex - it was about their chosen career paths and how they love every bits of such.
One speaker shared her passion for Statistics, while the other spoke of her great love for teaching the English language.
Truth be told, I was not really there. Notice the word hearing instead of listening in the 1st paragraph. Yes, I was physically there but my mind was elsewhere. I was trying to overcome "being neglected" and "certain guilt".
While in the verge of shedding buckets of tears and non stop bleeping of my mobile, I ended up drafting this - with high hopes that my negative energy at the time will morph to something positive.
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In between so many things I truly love doing, being an Ate (older sister) definitely tops everything in my current list. It is an inexplicable feeling ranging from utmost love to certain amount of disappointments. From petty fights to sheer happiness.
Being an Ate calls for a deeper sense of responsibility - whether I like it or not, I am a role model. I did not ask for it; It was actually given the moment my folks decided they want more kids.
In this society's smallest unit called Family, I take full responsibility when my parents could not - although such circumstance does not happen often. In fact, my wonderful parents are very able, something I am always grateful for.
Take for instance when my folks had to leave, I take charge of the household - ensure that my siblings have something healthy to eat, check their school works, help them with their assignments and the likes.
Sometimes, being an Ate is tough as it requires for more than just an A+ grade in school, not to mention you always have a life to attend to. It takes an unselfish act of love to be able to fair well in such a huge task.
One of the important things I've learned from this handed down job is that, I strive to always become a better individual not solely for myself but so my siblings will benefit from it. This does not always pertain to tangible materials, it could also be about the kind of life you live. Again, an Ate is a role model. Younger ones actually mimic you and observes the life that you have.
Over the years and while studying the lives of those who went before me, there is nothing like a legacy that can be passed on when it all started with love.
